Soon as someone tells you that you can't do a certain something on an instrument, then is the time to investigate that certain something. So how about: you can't play chords on a bass.

First we'll back Lou Reed. Play the Gb and open-D two-note chord (example 1), and slide the finger fretting the Gb down. Then slide a finger up the D-string, coming to rest on the B and joining the open-G to make the two-note chord in example 2. Slide about a bit between these two chords, and you're positively strolling along the Wild Side.

And a couple more random shapes to fool with, also two-note types (examples 3 and 4). You can use these anywhere, though on the E and A strings you'll find things getting distinctly muddy.

The fun, of course, is making up your own. Send in your fab bass-chord shapes to Making Music, and the best two will each win a set of Rotosound strings.