Magazine Archive

Home -> Magazines -> Issues -> Articles in this issue -> View

Dubba-Dubba, Cha!

Making friends in the studio.


It is not always easy to communicate your ideas with fellow musicians. So when the following transcript fell into our hands, we thought it a perfect opportunity to show how the PROFESSIONALS do it... the difference a PRODUCER can make.

A: It's a **** number one, it is, whether you think so or not. That is a **** number one. If that **** don't go, I **** retire, I do.

B: I agree it is a good song.

A: But it **** well won't be unless we spend a little bit of **** thought and imagination to **** make it a **** number one. You gotta put a little bit of fairy dust over the ****, you know.

B: So we'll put some fairy dust over it — I'll **** over the tapes. I know it needs strings, that I do know. Right?

A: And it needs something at the beginning of that number to make somebody remember it.

Eng: While we're arguing here we could be trying to get some sound out there. So what do you suggest, give it up for the night?

B: No, not at all, I don't say give it up. I'll stay here till tomorrow night.

Eng: We've got one, two, three, four, five, about six producers in here tonight. And because we haven't got a producer we're all pitching in ideas, most of them are wrong, you know.

B: Well we always do that.

Eng: We haven't got a producer, we were supposed to have a **** producer.

B: If we had faith in him, and we'd know whether we had faith in him within the first **** half an hour...

C: Did you do exactly what Larry Page said?

All: Yep!

B: Because there was just one **** mind on it, not **** seven or eight.

A: We didn't even get a say in it. It was wham, in the can, regardless.

D: You reckon that was bad? **** me, he used to, you know, one take, finished. We'd say: "Er, er..." You never had a **** say in it, it was out.

B: 'A Girl Like You' was **** terrible, and we said let's come in and do it again. And that was the only **** time he let us ****...

D: Have our way...

B: Have our way, and could we get anything better? ****... the first thing he did was IT...

A: We were in there all **** day, we were in there at 9 o'clock, we didn't come out till about 3 o'clock the next **** morning. Mick Jagger, you name them, they were in there, trying to make it better.

A: What about a **** 12-string on it?

— sound of 12-string... —

A: Yeah. No. You. had it there at the beginning, Ron. It was sounding good. Ron, Ronnie? Just listen for a sec.

E: You can say that all **** night, but I just can't feel it any other way than what I've been **** doing it.

B: You have played it tonight.

E: You'd better **** forget it, then, B because I ain't gonna be able to do it, I can tell you that now. I cannot **** do it. If that's the case we should find out before we ever **** get in the studio, do that, that and that. Don't expect **** miracles just like that, Reg. It's **** in there, embedded in there, I can't **** hear it any other way.

B: But you've done it. You... did it.

Eng: Exactly the same rhythm as you were playing before, da-da-da-da da cha, da-da-da-da da cha, on different drums, that's all.

B: And you're going da-da-da-da boom-boom ba!

Eng: Play da-da-da-da da cha.

B: No more beats.

Eng: Just play it da-da-da-da da cha on whatever drums you were playing it on originally, if you've got it embedded in there, and then start moving it about on different drums.

B: And you did it.

E: You can say that all **** night, but you won't listen. Just shut your **** mouths for five minutes and give me a **** chance to do it, don't keep rapping down that **** microphone, "Dit dit dir, dit dit dir".

A: **** me, Reg.

B: Just **** off in there and keep going through it.

E: I know it ain't **** right!!! I can **** hear it ain't right!

B: We can hear it's not right too.

E: (through gritted teeth) I **** can, and I'm the **** that's playing it. So, I can hear it in my head, yeah, that's what I've gotta do. Then I'll do it. You big ****

— bass notes... —

B: **** drummer, I **** him. Da-de-da-de-de (sings), da-de-da-de-de.

- bass and acoustic... —

B: One, two, a-one, two, three, four... You're doing it **** wrong.

E: I know I'm doing it **** wrong.

B: Dubba-dubba dubba-cha, dubba-dubba dubba-cha... You did it at the beginning. Bloody hell, I can't play with that.

E: Nor can I.

B: Ay?

E: Nor can **** I.

B: Well you're **** doing It!

E: I know, and I can't **** play to it either!

B: Ha, ha. Well why don't you just do what you **** started out doing. Dubba-dubba dubba-dubba cha. Do it on your top one, dubba-dubba dubba-dubba... cha!

- drums... -

Dubba-dubba dubba-dubba cha!

— drums... —

B: No!

— drums... —

E: Well then you're talking out the back of your **** arses, because all you want then, is the same **** thing that I was playing originally!

All: On different drums! On different **** drums.

E: Well then what you want is that one and the **** bass drum, playing the same thing.

B: You're the drummer.

E: Yes you **** do, 'cos that's all you're **** doing. You ain't playing any **** thing else. All right, I'll play that...

— drums... —

Eng: Exactly the same thing — on different drums.

A: You don't **** listen, that's your trouble.

E: Are you saying you want different things on different drums?

A: We're saying what you... and you did it. You **** did it. Dubba-dubba dacha, dubba-dubba da-cha.

Eng: And then change it round and do it the other **** way round.

A: We're only asking you to do half of it on one drum, half of it on the other, and the bang, wherever you want to bang.

B: Ronnie, can you hear me?

E: Yeah...

B: What about trying it not only, not on that top, just on that top skin floor and then your floor tom-tom, but try it on... split your hands so's that one beat is doing it on the top, er, drum, one's doing it on the floor tom-tom, then your bass.



Previous Article in this issue

Thompson Vocal Eliminator VE-1

Next article in this issue

When Is A Computer?


One Two Testing - Copyright: IPC Magazines Ltd, Northern & Shell Ltd.

 

One Two Testing - Jan 1984

Topic:

Humour


Feature

Previous article in this issue:

> Thompson Vocal Eliminator VE...

Next article in this issue:

> When Is A Computer?


Help Support The Things You Love

mu:zines is the result of thousands of hours of effort, and will require many thousands more going forward to reach our goals of getting all this content online.

If you value this resource, you can support this project - it really helps!

Please Contribute to mu:zines by supplying magazines, scanning or donating funds. Thanks!

We currently are running with a balance of £100+, with total outgoings so far of £1,036.00. More details...
muzines_logo_02

Small Print

Terms of usePrivacy