Andy Honeybone gets a keyboard, a few fingers and a shovel and builds himself some of the more pleasant chords of the world... brick by brick.

HAVING BEEN AWAY and looked in several books, I can firmly advise you that there are five types of chord. Over these two pages the intention is to show you how they can be produced with no more than three fingers in the right hand and one in the left. Not only that, but also info on how to juice them up to something well crucial (in the sense that you'll probably get thrown out of your band for getting too jazzy). As ever, a cautionary note: 'Kayleigh' contains no chords with altered thingies and can be played with simple triads. Take that how you like.

Be warned, the following may be hard going, but it's not intended as something which you breeze through in a few minutes — rather something that you use as a reference in conjunction with sessions at a keyboard.

First are major chords. These are chords having all major and perfect intervals. Don't just think of majors as being boring root, third, fifth triads (F,A,C) because they can be extended to the ever-popular major sevenths (F,A,C,E) and even more jazzy major ninths (F,A,C,E,G). Although we're getting into four-part territory now, it's worth including the much-neglected sixth (F,A,C,D) which supposedly came to favour through arrangements for four horns that were loath to double one note when it came to the major chord.

Second come the dominant chords which are simply formed from the major types by flattening the seventh (F,A,C,E-flat) (ie dominant chords are characterised by having a major third and a minor seventh). In altered forms these are the backbone of jazz playing as they crop up with such frequency. Note that an augmented chord (+5) is also a dominant chord (see chord of the month in part one). Additions to our F7 example above include: the major ninth (G), perfect eleventh (B-flat) and major thirteenth (D). For further jollies, the fifth may be raised or lowered bv a semitone (C-sharp/B natural) as may the ninth (G-flat/G-sharp). With so many variations it's difficult to appreciate how useful these chords are and nothing short of forming them at a keyboard is going to impress that on you. By way of explanation (now he tells us) all these intervals are compounded. If a chord is described as a thirteenth, it implies that the seventh and ninth are also present. If you run out of fingers, just play the upper notes against the bass.

The minor chords are characterised by having a minor third. The learned books disagree over further dogma with one bringing in an additional group to cover minor seventh chords as a separate entity. If we take this view, all the other intervals in a minor chord can be said to be major or perfect. The minor seventh group can then be said to have all major and perfect intervals except for the third and seventh which are both minor. Hence (B-flat, D-flat, F, A) is a minor chord (with a major seventh) and (B-flat, D-flat, F, A-flat) is a minor seventh chord. Perhaps it's splitting hairs for the sake of categorisation but to other purists, Go-Go, Rapping and Hip-Hop are worlds apart. Anyway, a minor chord can be extended by a major sixth (G in the case of the B-flat minor (major seventh) above), a major ninth (C) or a perfect eleventh (E-flat). Minor seventh chords can only take the major ninth and perfect eleventh.

Number four in this entirely arbitrarily arranged list is the half-diminished chord. Unlike the half-nelson or the attribute of being half-baked, this chord type is better known as a minor seventh with a flattened fifth. The chord is dissonant and I was just about to say that you'd never start a piece with it when I remembered that the 'Wedding March' does exactly that. Try (G, A, C, E-flat) with an (A) bass using a pipe organ preset on a handy DX-7 and the white Rolls will be at your door in seconds.

The chord is described as having a minor third (C), a diminished fifth (E-flat) and a minor seventh (G). What can you do to the beast? Add a major ninth (B), a perfect eleventh (D) or a minor thirteenth (F). The ninth may be lowered (B-flat).

The last group of chords is termed diminished and can be spotted by the minor third and diminished fifth (G, B-flat, D-flat). There is a whole bundle of confusion over what a diminished seventh chord is when it is created by the addition of a sixth (E) to the previous chord. Apparently, before the sixth was a bona fide chord, arrangers were specifying a diminished seventh chord with the seventh flattened by the symbol dim 7. It all comes out in the wash and if dim-6 chords are played whenever a dim is required, you won't be at all wrong. There are only three dim-6 chord shapes because the same four component notes make four different chords — try it. Chromatically ascending diminished chords are what are played to accompany silent films when the train is approaching the heroine tied to the track. Additions to the chord include the major seventh (F-sharp), perfect eleventh (C) and minor thirteenth (E-flat).

Brain sweaty, wasn't it, but worthwhile. Now for how to form the basic five chord types as promised, with a minimum of fuss.

%image2% If you can remember back to the article on chord building on various degrees of the major scale, you will know that major, minor and diminished chords result. These triads will be our starting point. The minor seventh chord is easily given by playing a major chord over a bass note a minor third lower. It sounds much more complex than it is, for example an E-flat chord (B-flat, E-flat, G) played over a (C) bass gives a C minor seventh. A dominant seventh chord can be constructed by a diminished chord (B,D,F) played over a bass note a major third lower (G) giving G7. If the same diminished chord is played over a bass note a minor third lower (A-flat), the resulting chord is A-flat dim 7.

The half-diminished chord can be produced by playing a minor chord (E-flat,G-flat,B-flat) over a bass note a minor third lower (C). Finally, major seventh chords can be fudged by playing a minor chord (A,C,E) over a bass note a major third lower (F).

Feeling mysterious, suspect, scary? This makes a good final chord for a spooky twist to the end of a section in a minor key. It should be played with a C bass and is known, in literary circles, as a C minor (maj9). Play it with the lights on in your bedroom if it helps.