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The Jay Arthur Column

crap spotter


Jay Arthur is a merry, fun-loving sort of chap who likes nothing better than to find evidence in print of general stupidity. He's especially keen on indecisive reviews that conclude you should make up your own mind, on pretentious waffle, and on good old cock-ups.

Jay likes this stuff so much, in fact, that he rewards people who send him examples of such rubbish with badges and stickers from the Making Music Badges & Stickers Collection. Send your silly old nonsense to Jay Arthur, Silly Old Nonsense Dept, (Contact Details).

"Robert is a length of string..."
— Ron Rom, Loop interview, Sounds, Feb '87

"I've just heard that the ANC have officially condemned Paul Simon. What a disgrace - Paul Simon is a man who's probably done more than anybody else for black musicians..."
— Johnny Walker, Radio One, Feb 87

"It doesn't matter that The Anti Group [are] troubled by the inadequacy of words. Through it all emerges a proposal for a hyper-hyper-psychedelic, sourceless, practically unimaginable proto-music that threatens to obliterate the principles of communication, the individual and reality."
— Paul Oldfield, interview, Melody Maker, Feb 87

"But when a Gamelan, epileptic millipede crawls from your nostril and starts nibbling at the dead flesh on your upper lip, don't scratch; that'll be Stump happening, 'small' but sure."
— David Stubbs, Stump interview, Melody Maker, Feb 87

"Old techno-rockers never die, they just embrace newer technology!"
— Time Out Bill Bruford preview, March 4-11, 87

"When you consider a masterwork like 'Sergeant Pecker'..."
— Mike Sparrow, Radio London, Feb 87 talking to George Martin

"As far as microphones are concerned generally it is a case of suck it and see."
— producer Mike Vernon, interviewed in Home & Studio Recording, March 87

"You can put a black animal in a brown basket to this."
— Chris Roberts, reviewing EG Records sampler, Melody Maker, March 87

"It's always nice to have energy creep up over your shoulders like a living, breathing carpet..."
— LP review by 'Pratninja' for Underground

"Iggy Pop's 'Gimme Danger', a thinly veiled tribute to Baudelaire..."
— Don Watson, NME, March 87


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Graphiti

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Sampling Through The Ages


Making Music - Copyright: Track Record Publishing Ltd, Nexus Media Ltd.

 

Making Music - Apr 1987

Topic:

Humour


Feature

Previous article in this issue:

> Graphiti

Next article in this issue:

> Sampling Through The Ages


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